I’ve been trying to convince my mom to replace the rotting cherry tree on the front lawn with an evergreen. Then she could just dress it every Christmas and not have to slaughter an innocent tree.

I’ve seen a lot of Christmas decorations in my time, but this has got to be one of the more macabre ones to date. It reminds me of those witch doctors’ shrunken heads you’d see in cartoons and comics. The only things that are missing are lifeless eyes and sewn-shut lips.

I’ve spent Christmas in a lot of different cities across two countries, and I can honestly say that none of them come even remotely close to New York in terms of sheer magic in the air.